We're Outta Here!

Homeless people are literally leaving Seattle by the busloads. In the past two months nearly four thousand have left by Greyhound, bound mainly for East Coast cities. The departures have been coordinated. They leave daily, each bus carrying away up to fifty homeless men, women, and children.

Some pay their own fare, others have their fares paid for them, generally by national organizations dedicated to homeless causes. Chief among these is the American Homeless Union. Recently the Seattle head of the AHU, Phil M. Hand, explained the ongoing exodus this way: "Basically around December or January we all began to realize that we really weren't wanted here in Seattle. And we're not masochists, OK? I mean, we've been working hard for years at making this city a real haven for our folks, but if Seattle isn't into it, we can live with that."

Further details are sketchy. The rumors among street people (what's left of them) are, as always, incomplete and unreliable. What is certain is that the departures began near the end of January and coincided with a number of setbacks for the homeless in this city. There was the recent reclearing of the "Jungle" along I-5, and the so-called sweep of the Municipal Building encampment.

But worst of all was the resistance by local merchants to plans to expand laundry and shower facilities at a few downtown service-centers. As one Belltown alley resident put it, "I always knew no one wanted me around when I was dirty and smelled like a sewer. But when I saw they didn't want me clean and smelling like a rose, either, I really got the message! It is personal, isn't' it? So right then I spent my welfare check on a ticket to Pittsburgh. I'll be gone by tomorrow."

The repercussions of this mass exodus cannot be understated. Most of Seattle's homeless-advocacy groups have already ceased to function, even though the last busload of homeless isn't expected to depart until mid-April. These groups include SHARE, WHEEL, and Operation Homestead. Several hundred social workers formerly employed by service agencies throughout the city have already been laid off.

But in addition to the expected, there have been some perhaps unexpected consequences of the sudden scarcity of homeless. For example, at City Hall, everyone from Norm Rice to Mark Sidran is complaining about the long waits for cab rides.

It seems that as many as one-third of all Seattle taxi drivers have been homeless and are now driving elsewhere. Dishes are piling up unwashed in even the best local restaurants, houses are going unpainted, and overgrown backyards are remaining so. Non-homeless residents are experiencing more muggings and burglaries than ever, now that gangs don't have easier targets to victimize.

Gay-bashing and race-related violence is on the increase again as "bum-bashing" declines. Dumpsters are overflowing with recyclables throughout the city. Seattle is awash in aluminum cans, refundable bottles, reparable TV sets, and stereos.

Corner rose-vendors have vanished and with them half the street musicians. And many service-industry businesses are discovering that they can't afford to pay the higher wages demanded and required by rent-paying and home-owning citizens. To help with these and other problems, the city has established special consulting hotlines. Anyone concerned may request assistance or further information at 684-8200.

Naturally, the Real Change homeless newspaper will not be unaffected. "Sure, we'll keep operating for a couple of months," said Timothy "Make My Day" Harris. I mean, we've got donations coming in, and we've got our subscribers and our advertisers. But let's face it. People are going to catch on."

"With no vendors and nothing to write about, what are we going to do? Well, I'll tell you what I'm gonna do! Get the hell out of here! That's what!"

Perhaps he'll head for Pittsburg.

Cut and Waste

by © Dr. Wendy Browning

Obsessed with cut and paste techniques, my plan this month was to assemble a poem from alternating lines of prose by Henry Miller and James Joyce. Unfortunately, these two guys almost never make sense together. See for yourself:

If the sewer mains were open you held your nose

-Fretted forlorn, dreamily rose.

Round and round one walks seeking the hub

-Best value in Dub.

So instead we'll talk about pro hygiene center signs. It seems that "no hygiene center" signs are appearing at some businesses downtown and we at the Real Change want to encourage everyone to counter with their own hygiene center signs. In order to help people along with this, I have been asked by the management to offer some samples.

Here are some of my first efforts.

Hygiene - An Idea whose time has come!

A clean street person is an invisible street person.

Help give Seattle's homeless the scrubbing they deserve!

Would a bum by any other name
smell the same?
Not with hygiene centers!

At this point I felt something was missing and sought consultation. My good friend Andy was unavailable, recovering from an operation. So I turned to Tim Harris, who advised, "More pith! Make them rhyme!" So pith it is.

A dirty bum is disgusting to see

With hygiene centers they needn't be.

A hygiene center down the block

Means clean shiny bums `round the clock.

Let the homeless have showers, So they'll all smell like flowers!

Say yes to hygiene centers

they're absolutely right

The homeless need soap and water

to make themselves look bright.

It would be so keen

if the homeless were clean

so please don't be mean

support centers of hygiene.

Finally, an artistic contribution:

Hygiene Haiku, or Opus 19,

My Second Haiku with Content

Morning, a clean bum.

All around hygiene centers -

Cherry blossom time.